Das Einsame Herz GERMAN by Heinz Gunther Konsalik

By Heinz Gunther Konsalik

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Otto Heinrich sah ihm nach und beneidete ihn: Fehlin; er ruhte in seinem Fleisch, war stets auf die gleiche Art ironisch und distanziert, selbstsicher und gelassen. Und du? Dich bestürmen Worte, du versuchst sie zu bändigen, verbringst deine Tage in der Universität und bildest dir ein, bei all dem Gerede über Zusammensetzung und Veränderung der Stoffe ein Nachfolger der großen Alchimisten zu sein. Zu Hause spielst du den gehorsamen Sohn und liest heimlich die revolutionären Verse der Emigranten, inszenierst dein ureigenes, persönliches kleines Welt-Theater.

Jedes Gefühl, das echt sein will, anerkennt keine Grenzen…« »Na, vielleicht. « Otto Heinrich lachte. Dann ging er weiter und wurde nachdenklich. War es so, wie Fehlin sagte? Schimmerte nicht ein Funken Wahrheit hinter seinem Spaß? Bestand er tatsächlich nur aus Emotionen? Was war es, das ihn Heines Freiheits-Verse in die Nacht schreien ließ? Sein eigenes Bedürfnis nach Freiheit? Wie sollte er es nicht mitfühlen, was in diesem großen Dichter vorging? Heine hatte man die Heimat entzogen. Und Goethe?

Heine hatte man die Heimat entzogen. Und Goethe? Der erlauchte, der größte, der göttliche Goethe ging nach Karlsbad zur Kur und erholte sich bei seiner jungen Geliebten Ulrike, während um ihn die Welt zu Bruch ging… Und all dies sollte kein Gefühl erregen? »Sie haben längst angefangen«, sagte Fehlin. Schon von weitem, ehe sie die Pappeln erreichten, die den flachen Ziegelbau des Ausflugslokals verbargen, waren Stimmen zu hören. Männerstimmen. Singen. ›Gaudeamus igitur‹ Das Lied der Burschenschaft.

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